I don’t know how many times I’ve read things like ‘mums, to get a break, have a shower or do the dishes with your headphones on’. This gets me cranky every time I read it. Self care is so important. If we are not filling our own cup, we have nothing to pour out to others. As the old saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup.
I’ve made conscious changes in my life to look after myself better. Most of these changes I have to do without the help of my husband or relying on him to have the kids. He’s a great dad….I just get tired of asking for, what seems like, permission to do things for myself. He doesn’t normally say no to me if I ask him to have the kids so I can go to the gym etc but I get tired of having to ask that question as we, as women, are expected to be the primary carers for our kids.
So how do I make it work for me? I go to the gym when the kids are in care. I workout at home after the kids are in bed at night. I make sure that each day I do something that’s all about me for at least 30mins. It could be reading my book before falling asleep, exercising, doing a jigsaw puzzle, playing my playstation or switch. I like picking things that use my mind. I find that when I do things that use my mind, I then can zone out and not think about all the little things I should be doing (or feel I should be doing).
The days that I don’t have time for myself are the days that I lose it at my kids. Get cranky with my husband and generally feel crap about things. I also make sure that I have systems in place that make my housework and other tasks easier to keep on top of. For house work, I have a laundry roster – I do one persons washing per day, I have an app I use for my cleaning tasks around the house and I keep a planner/diary for all the bits and pieces that I need or want to achieve in a day.
Having these systems in place makes it easier for me to find time for me. I schedule it in. Sometimes I have 5 or 6 kids at home and those are the days I need me time more than ever.
So make sure you are a priority for yourself. You can’t look after others if you are not looking after yourself.
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